Breaking: Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s love story is one of connection and shared values. Despite challenges, their relationship has remained strong, built on mutual respect, support, and a desire to create a life of purpose together. They seem deeply committed to each other and their growing family….

With all the hype and controversy surrounding their marriage on Saturday, I thought it would be interesting to analyse the drivers and dynamics of Harry & Meghan’s high-profile relationship. As a Communication Strategist and coach this is very much the type of dynamic I explore to help understand stakeholder relationships and how to influence them.

The Hook

Watching Megan’s performance in their engagement interview, Megan’s star quality and beautiful sensitivity were very evident. She consciously or sub-consciously channels / duplicates Princess Diana and this resonates very deeply with Prince Harry. In this relationship, Harry has finally re-connected with his late mother through Meghan. He is spellbound and very much in love with her. Megan’s energy feeds him emotionally at a very deep level.

The personality types

Harry – Harry strikes me as very much an Amiable (relationship-oriented) personality type. He is extremely relationship-oriented, is very sensitive, and needs deep and tender connections. This has driven his keen interest in people and helping others. His amazing charity work and similar initiatives have been largely driven by this relationship / nurturing aspect of his personality. His personality type also propels his need to find a soul mate and a partner to share his life and inner world with. He desperately searches for true (mother’s) love, protection and nurturing, which he lost at such a young age when his mother Diana died.

Meghan – Megan strikes me as a ‘chameleon’ personality type. She is a strong all-rounder, has strengths in every quadrant, and has four different areas of her personality that require stimulation. She is super intelligent, super successful and super ambitious.

Breaking her profile down:

Driver (goal orientation) – Meghan is extremely goal oriented. This explains why she has risen to the top in a very competitive and challenging profession. She knows what she wants, and she goes for it. Success and getting to the top are very important drivers for her. This high drive will be compounded by her humble background and this compels her to push even harder in life for what she wants. Succeeding and getting to the top are very important to her. She now has a golden opportunity to become part of the top Royal family in the world. She will strive to make this happen, no matter what the challenges, as we have seen in the last week.

Expressive (Performance orientation) – Every actress needs this in their personality. This extraverted energy is essential for strong and impactful performances. This is where charisma and ‘wow’ personalities come from, and Meghan has this in abundance. She loves performing, being the star and generating mass attention. Her successful career as a TV actress gave her this, and now she has a world stage as Prince Harry’s wife and an English princess.

Amiable (relationship orientation) – Megan’s social conscience comes through with this side of her personality. I don’t think this is as high as her Driver and Expressive sides, but it is likely to be a good middle score. She has done a lot of good social work in the past and her ability to nurture others shines through here. This is also where Meghan and Harry have their strongest connection point, and where Meghan represents Harry’s mother Princess Diana in his sub-conscious. This resonance will be a hugely strong pull for Harry. He will literally be under her spell because of his high Amiable side, and his deep need to reconnect with his mother through his wife.

Analytical (thinking orientation) – Meghan also demonstrates these qualities with her intelligence and ability to consider and strategise. She is a good planner and will find a way to achieve her goals. The shadow side of this is that she could be manipulative and calculating.

The Relationship Dynamic – Harry and Megan “get each other” most strongly on the Amiable axis, for that is Harry’s deep sub-conscious need and emotional pull. She is generally stronger than him and her strong and controlling Drive comforts and protects him, in the same way that his late mother did.

From Meghan’s side, her new Royal life excites and stimulates her in at least three of her quadrants (Driver, Expressive and Amiable). She is one of the most famous women in the world now, has an enormous platform and social voice and has certainly made it to the top.

Possible derailers – Megan will be happy as long as she is stimulated. The routine of Royal life is extremely repetitive and the Royal court and courtiers very old fashioned, conventional and suffocating. This is likely to be the major stress and conflict in her life, like many women who have married into the Royal family before her.

Because Megan is so ambitious and looks for the ‘wow’ factor, Harry needs to keep her stimulated and excited. If he becomes boring and staid, or if a more exciting man comes along, this could spell trouble. When the honeymoon phase of the relationship is over, and if Meghan no longer mothers and nurtures Harry, this could cause hurt and ultimate resentment on his side.

Conclusion: The couple need to understand each other’s needs and drivers to make this marriage work. This is completely possible, but will take work and effort from both sides.